Sunday, December 23, 2012

The Last Days of Saint Nicholas Daniel C. Merrill MD

"I'm definitely getting too old for this," Nicholas said to his best friend and lead reindeer Rudolf. "How long have I been Santa Claus do you think?" "I don't know that I can rightly recall," replied Rudolf, "but it must be close to 300 years, give or take a decade or two." Nicholas' sainted father, the first Santa Claus, had learned to communicate with reindeer years before Nicholas was born. His father taught Nicholas the reindeer language shortly before he was killed by an errant meteorite that hit his sleigh while he and his reindeer were making their rounds on that fateful Christmas eve night in the year 1842. Nicholas had inherited his father's job and, with the help of his faithful reindeer, had been navigating through the cold Christmas Eve nights ever since. With the exception of a few times when the weather was so bad that mail could not be delivered to the north pole, Nicholas and his reindeer never failed to deliver the books, toys and dolls that the good boys and girls of the world had requested in their letters to Santa. Nicholas also made sure that he never ran out of lumps of coal for the stockings of children who had not been so good. But Nicholas was getting old and Rudolph was also beginning to feel the ravages of age."You know Rudolph," Nicholas said, " my eye sight isn't what it used to be and I'm having a fair amount of difficulty navigating by the stars now days." "I'm a little afraid that we might not be able to find our way home this year." "I'm not feeling so great myself," replied Rudolph, "My poor old nose isn't as bright as it used to be and the arthritis in my right rear hoof won't let me fly nearly as fast as I could when you first asked me to lead your sleigh." "In truth, I just don't know how much longer I can go on. I know Vixen and Prancer aren't feeling very well either. Vixen was saying just the other day, when the elves were packing the toys in the back of the sleigh, that his arthritis was so bad that he could barely walk. Our Prancer can't exercise anymore and has gained so much weight during the off season that it will be difficult for him to get into his harness, let alone fly any great distance." "Obviously, it's time to call it quits," Nicholas said, "in fact, it's long past time that we retired." Rudolph placed both of his front hoofs on Nickolas' shoulders, looked sadly into his old friends eyes and began to cry as he shook his stately antlered head in agreement. It was only a month before Christmas and that left Nicholas very little time. He had to make certain that those presents were delivered on Christmas Eve night, just as they had been for almost three centuries. Nicholas called his friend, billionaire Bill Gates, and asked for help. "Bill," he said, "we're in big trouble up here at the North Pole. My reindeer and I are too old and infirm to make the Christmas run this year. An awful lot of children are going to be very disappointed if we don't deliver their Christmas presents on time." "I've made a tentative deal with UPS They have agreed to deliver the presents on Christmas Eve night as has always been the case. Our friend Scott Davis at UPS has even agreed to dress their drivers up in Santa Clause suits if we are willing to pay a little extra for the deliveries. Unfortunately, Mrs. Nicholas and I do not have the resources to finance an operation of this size, could you help?" "Of course, I can," Mr. Gates Replied without hesitation. "Look Nicholas, I'm a little tied up right at the moment with some pressing problems involving the famine in the Congo. Just have Scott send me the bill, If he wants to, he can call me." So it came to pass. The children's Christmas presents were delivered on time and no one was the wiser. Nicholas gave his toy factory at the North Pole to his grandson Max who wanted to become the next Santa Claus. He packed up all of his possessions, including the sleigh, and moved to an island in the Caribbean. He and his beloved reindeer spent their last days swimming in the warm ocean water and building sand castles with their newfound monkey friends on the beautiful black sand beaches under the shade of the magnificent palm trees which lined the island's shore.

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